I’m fresh from the Self Employment Telesummit, and my heart is full. So many threads from the whole event came together for people in our closing session on self-sourcing boundless confidence and motivation. I am going to share some of them here.
Let’s begin with a quote from Seneca: “It’s not because things are difficult that we dare not venture. It’s because we dare not venture that they are difficult.”
To venture means to do something risky, and risk in self-employment happens on multiple levels.
- Financial
- Rejection
- Possible failure at work you love
- Not getting your message across/not being understood
- Looking foolish
In light of those risks, choosing to build a business that blossoms, that is truly profitable, takes confidence. That begs the question, where do you get that confidence?
Because let’s face it. You can learn all about authentic marketing and sales. You can believe that business doesn’t have to be sleazy or cheesy. But it takes confidence to take the regular daily action that leads to real profitability.
The secret to confidence is keeping commitments to yourself
Confidence means self-trust. When you keep commitments to yourself, your self-trust increases.
The thing is, it’s easy to make a casual commitments to yourself. You promise yourself to write a home page, to start blogging, to follow up with prospects because you think you should. And like a half-attentive spouse, you may say, “Yes, dear,” without real commitment.
In addition, shoulds trigger resistance. The child in us is overwhelmed by the pressure. The teenager is defiant. And the adult resents being shoulded on.
The problem is that, while you may make commitments only half-consciously, your whole being suffers when you don’t keep them. With every unfulfilled commitment, self-trust takes a hit. Confidence plummets.
Commitments you keep are conscious and manageable
On the other hand, when you consciously make promises you can actually keep, you follow through. Every time you do that self-trust increases.
It’s a beautiful thing, and it is so very simple.
Conditions of satisfaction ==> successful commitments
Conditions of satisfaction are the key to conscious, manageable commitments. They are standards you set for what it means to fulfill your commitment.
Effective conditions of satisfaction are:
- Simple, easy to understand, and observable.
- Within your control. You can’t control whether your book is a bestseller or your paintings are selected for an exhibit. You can control how many words you write each day or how often you submit your paintings to curators.
- Time-specific. When/over what period will you do what you say you will do?
When you set conditions of satisfaction, you know what it will take to meet your commitment, and you’re more likely to do so.
But there’s more.
Conditions of satisfaction ==> confidence when you declare yourself satisfied
To benefit from conditions of satisfaction, you need to pause and declare yourself satisfied. Otherwise, you can come through for yourself but not really take it in. You end up chasing a moving target.
When you stop and declare yourself satisfied, something inside says, “Yes! I came through for myself!” This is huge. Please don’t underestimate the power of this simple practice. Every time you come through for yourself (and are conscious of it), your confidence grows.
That’s one of the magic formulas, if you want to call it that, for making a business blossom.
There’s so much more I could share from this one session, not to mention from the telesummit as a whole, but there’s not room here. As my gift to you, you can download the handout and audio for the whole session here==> Self-sourcing confidence and motivation.
Is it time to tap a deeper source of confidence and get traction with what matters most?
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Photo credit: fishin widow via flickr
