Is it time to be disappointing?

by | Sep 3, 2012

Have you ever felt frantic while suspecting that on some level you were complicit in your discomfort?

I felt this way today as I became increasingly pressured and anxious about getting things done. All week I had been moving things that I couldn’t finish from one day to the next. As I write this it is Friday, and all those things are stacked up before me.

Throughout the morning I became more and more wound up until I found myself on the phone with someone who had questions about Authentic Wealth. I wanted to be present with her even more than I wanted to get everything done.

Showing up for her woke me up to the fact that I have a choice. I don’t have to keep stacking things up. I can simply drop what I can not do.

So I surrendered.

Today I’m letting go of deadlines. I’m letting go of writing the article I meant to write for this ezine. I’m canceling participation in an upcoming telesummit. I’m going to risk being a disappointment.

I learned that being disappointing was a viable option almost 30 years ago from Claudia Carlson Mansfield. What I discovered was that an amazing amount of generosity and presence can flow from that decision.

I don’t know where you might be creating pressure and anxiety in your life. Perhaps that’s not something you do.

But if, like me, your best intentions sometimes turn peace into frenzy, I invite you to stop for just a moment. Contemplate what would happen if you simply surrendered.

If you find that the world would not stop spinning on its axis, consider the option of being disappointing.

An important discernment
There’s a difference between being disappointing in a generative way and simply checking out, retreating into a cave, and abdicating all responsibility.

One way to discern that difference is to feel into your physical and emotional state. Does you decision make you feel more or less connected? More or less present? More or less grounded?

Does it produce in you a feeling of generosity or defensiveness? Of spaciousness or contraction?